Girl had a small success this weekend! She peed on the pot for the first time ever in her entire (yet short) little life.
I, on the other hand, need a stiff drink.
I think she does too.
The promise was to give the diapers to the Easter Bunny because she needed them for her new babies and since we really didn't need them anymore, she could have Girl's.
The trip to the mall to meet the big bunny should have been the tip off. We saw him/her (is it a boy or a girl bunny anyway?) sitting in his/her chair holding a small electric fan to his bulbous head.
"What is he holding Mamma?"
"It looks like an electric fan baby, he must be hot here in the mall. You know, he's a hard worker."
"Ok, I'm done, lets go!"
"But we didn't tell him to come and get your diapers this weekend. How will he know to come to get them?"
"He won't."
OK then, mission aborted.
Saturday we (and I say we because it's like we're dealing with my ass as well) woke up fairly dry so I suggested sitting. All went well. Just sitting. Patiently. Waiting. For. A. Long. Long. Time. On. The. Potty. Doing. Nothing. But. Sitting. Oh! And Reading. About. 2,000 books.
She pops up.
"I'm done!" Was her reply after what had to be three hours.
"But you didn't go yet."
"I know."
OK...Mission aborted.
With all the enthusiasm I could muster with cramped legs and a pain in my lower back from sitting on the floor in front of the potty, I whimper..."Want to try on your big girl panties?!"
"Okay Mamma...I'll pick them"
That's when the real-life artwork comes to be. Panties strewn all over the bedroom floor a la last summer's attempt. Welcome to my nightmare.
We finally get her downstairs with her new panties on but nothing else. What is it about this kid? She has to have the panties showing. She has to wear a short shirt so they stick out and under no circumstances will she be wearing pants over them. (Ugh...I see it now...trouble at 13!) Just like her mother.
Needless to say, she held it in most of the time! Running to the pot every time she felt the urge, but nothing. Peein' on my floor more than Art ever did. It finally happened after much M&M persuasion and she clung to my shoulders for dear life. What a scene. We cheered and laughed and high-fived but that was it. It was over. She was cooked.
That night she refused to give her diapers up. She said to give that bunny a couple of diapers and she'll keep the rest. (Swear that's what she said!) She didn't want to keep him hanging, I guess.
Cut to the next day (Easter) when she peed all over the floor and slip-slided all over it. But refused to take a bath....We had to go to the in-laws smelling like Penn Station.
Fun times for all.
"No pull ups, or panties, I don't want to wear anything"...screaming and yelling and physically fighting me. On our way to the in-laws, with a very pissed off kid and a very pissed on mother. (I figure, when it gets physical, she's just not ready. Right?)
Oh, did I mention she's been holding in the poop too.. On ex-lax no less. I can't even take a half a corner of an ex-lax without keeling over...she's been' on them for a week and held it in for two whole days. (I'm doomed.)
Needless to say, after her fits of fear, rage and anger, she's sleeping in a diaper and wearing pull ups during the day.
Mission aborted once again.
Sorry Easter Bunny.
27 comments:
I swear, her and mine are twins. I so feel your pain, Janet!! You're such a good storyteller!
When we were in the ER last week, the nurse asked if I could get her to pee in a cup. And I looked solemnly at the floor, and said, "Uh, no." What's even more stressful is she is supposed to start school in 5 months. Ugh.
Wow... what a rough weekend.
And anything anyone has to say on the subject really won't change things. For whatever reason she is either averse to the change or prefers the convenience of the diapers.
The only idea that occurs to me is the easier said than done battle of wills: stop buying the diapers. Yes, she will urinate on the floor. Yes, you will have to clean up (however with her help; she will eventually realize that if she goes in the toilet there is no cleanup).
The problem with what you're going through right now is she really has no incentive. She knows the diapers are there. She knows that if she makes enough of a mess on the floor you will give up.
They say parenting is knowing when to pick your battles. It sounds like, unfortunately, this is one you have to pick. And it won't be pretty, I'm afraid.
Best of luck.
Wow, she peed in the potty. What an ordeal. Poor girlies. The day will eventually come. Hang in there! I let Jacob run around without a diaper from time to time, and I swear he makes himself pee because he thinks its funny looking coming out of his p---s. lol
That stinks!
It's just not worth the stress. I promise one day she'll just announce she's ready for big girl panties and that will be that. It is not a reflection on you, rather her asserting her independence (which you'll love when she can stand up to the boys).
Sorry, hope that wasn't too preachy. I just hate to hear you getting stressed.
I agree with SciFi Dad ... But never ever attempt when you have plans, holidays etc.
Just have a weekend and make like no big deal out of it (since we have all witnessed that doesn't work for SF). Be all psshaa no diapers, sorry. If asked if you will get more, nah and walk away. It will leave the kid confused but maybe she will take matters into her own hands? (You know I am talking smack right and really have no clue but figure keeping at it is important).
Even if she asks if you want her to go potty be all like, whatever IF you WANT to go potty go for it ... then walk away. If it is a "power struggle" (I hate that phrase but have no alternative) then all the "power" is with SF. If she has an accident, toss her a towel and let her clean it up (hehe then do a do-over when she is not looking).
Pull ups totally confused Becca and we had a tough time convincing her that one does not Pee in panties and keep pull ups dry so we abandon those real fast. Becca still has accidents, and sleeps with diapers (that is part laziness on my part to be honest and now Ethan is here we are so not going there!)
You rock. SF totally rocks. It will work out ... maybe not today, tomorrow or even this season but girl you will get there ...
HUGS
Ok, I'm going to say I think the exact opposite of Scifi dad. I personally would leave it alone for now. Sounds like she has her own strong opinion on PT'ing right now too.
I think the deciding factor of whether you can take a stance such as Scifi Dad's recommendation is the personality of your child. As in how stubborn are they? I tried to take such a do-or-die stand with my oldest and it was absolute hell. He was going to PT on my time line by god and he was going to be out of diapers when I SAID. Uh, yeah right. It only made us miserable.
I tried every incentive under the sun, got rid of diapers, let him run in undies, naked, took entire weekends where we had no diapers, yada yada. Nothing worked. We began to have constipation that laxatives didn't help too. He is a VERY strong willed child. We were stressed out. He finally started using the potty when he was ready. He was over 3. It was ok that he was still in dipes on his third birthday.
Lesson learned and I took a very laid back approach with ds #2. He PT'd much sooner (under 2. 5 yrs old) and much quicker and with zero stress.
Each child is different when it comes to PT'ing. The parent-in-control potty training works for some. Not so with others. I found out the hard way and if I had PT'ing to do over again with son #1, I would not pick that battle. It taught me that while I *think* I have omnipotent power over my kids, I really don't.
Good luck!
All I can do is thank goodness for daycare. They trained The Mayor and I hope they'll do The Rooster too.
Hang in there.
I know nothing about potty training, so I won't give any advice!
Great job going! As for the rest, she'll do it when she's ready. Mine was 4 before she fully gave them up. I think it's hilarious that she gave some to the bunny! Ha!
I don't know if I had it easy or not. We used to take Kiddo to the potty on occasion and try to "show" him. But he wore diapers till just about 1 month after his 3rd birthday. Everyone but one friend gave me a hard time. The one friend, said, oh don't listen to them, he'll just do it when he's ready. She was right. 4 weeks after his 3rd birthday he announced to me that he didn't want diapers anymore and he started using the potty on his own. Yes there was the occasional accident, and he was always so embarrassed, but he was fine.
But....he had to wear the goodnights at night till he was almost 7. The kid just wouldn't wake up to go pee, and I was getting sick and tired of changing his bed in the middle of the night, dumping a bottle of fabreeze on it, and flipping the matress. So...he was in goodnights till then. Now he is pretty good I think.
Good Luck, I think you should take all the advice with a grain of salt and just do what works for you two.
I am not looking forward to potty training again! My son was so easy and I have a feeling that my daughter is not! She is already a stubborn one!
that sounds like one hell of a weekend!
Well, it sounds like you had a good plan (give the diapers to the Easter Bunny).
Hang in there. It will happen sooner or later!
Oh...I almost forgot.
Were you serious when you said you (her mom) also like to wear short skirts and leave your panties showing?
awwwww.. it is HARD to potty train them! i remember trying to potty train blake and he just wasn't getting it. and then i thought "why the hell do i want him potty trained so badly? he's obviously not ready." and i let him stay in diapers. then when he was ready to be potty trained, it literally took ONE day. and he was fully trained in less than a week. i guess for blake, i've learned that he is definitely on his own timetable, not mine. :) good luck!
How old is SF? Is she your first? I think there's all sorts of pressure/confusion with the first. Mine are both boys and the first one REFUSED to pee in the pot until one magical day when he turned three. Then he just did it. Never had an accident. But I honestly didn't know if he actually knew what peeing in the pot meant until that moment. My second watched the first so he could pee in the pot from 2 yrs on, but could care less if he peed in his underwear until fairly recently (3.5). They're all different, and I would say if she's under 2.5 let her do her thing in pullups. If she's over 2.5 throw her in underwear and still let her do her thing. She'll either love it or hate it, and you'll either be doing lots of laundry or not...
"He won't." cracked the hell out of me. as did: "I know" and "give him a couple and I'll keep the rest."
Otherwise, sorry, baby...that has got to be rough. It's too bad that we have to pee, huh?
OMG.
You KNOW that I feel your pain in every possible way. Yes, every kid is different. Yes, they will go when they are ready. Yes, incentives can help. BUT. I think that it has a lot of to with CONTROL. It's one of the few things that a child can control - at least they will try like heck to. I've told my son - poop and pee HAVE to come out of your body. It'll make you sick if it stays in. (He did end up in the ER) Not eating does NOT stop the poop from coming. Yada yada yada.
Some days I'm supportive and understanding, and other days I want to throw him threw a wall concerning this.
TRY to keep calm. Right now I have Pumpkin sitting on the potty for 10 minutes every 2 hours.
He IS getting better. Princess is just about there. Her issue was pee, and I think she was just lazy.
And now I have the potty in the kitchen, because SWEETPEA is now in pull-ps and potty training. DRINK PLEASE. She sits on it and says PSSSSSSSSSSSSS mommy!
Lovely.
Everyone is a comedian.
And we'll laugh about this one day.
Take good care, and drink A LOT. I'm here for you.
I too am in Potty Purgatory. (Actually a title in one of my recent posts LOL) We will get thru it! I promise!
I'm exhausted just reading this. I know it feels like forever but she will EVENTUALLY get it. Hang in there. You're doing a great job.
My son used to sit on the potty for-ever as well - with nothing to show at the end of it. My husband came up with the fabulous idea of getting some cold water and sticking my son's hand in it while he was sitting on the potty. And guess what?? IT WORKED!!!!
You never know ...
Oh how I hate Pullups. Nearly as much as diapers. Nothing like trying to deal with an accident in one of those things. I make a mess every time.
Oh boy!
I remember how stressful potty training Casey was...
and I get to do it again w/ Magoo!
Oh... I can hardly wait!!
I know what did happen w/ Casey was..... once I just gave up...
he started pee'ing on his own!
It was the darndest thing!
Welcome to MY nightmare. I think she and Hadley are in conspiracy together...
Girl you KNOW I understand where you are coming from. Sounds like you did the right thing by aborting the mission. If you keep on trying...these small successes will make way to larger successes. Just having her use the toilet, even once, is a HUGE victory for you!
Drink a cocktail and try again next week. You are heading in the right direction!
Screw the Easter Bunny! He has enough diapers already! :)
Oh, brutal! I feel badly for you. Potty training can be very difficult when a child is not motivated to do it. I wish you luck!
Ohhhhhhh, I'm enjoying reading up on all your posts so much! I should be sleeping, but you always lure me in and make me want to read just..one...more. :D
First of all, the diapers for the baby bunnies was a precious idea! I wish it had worked. I haven't been regular with the potty training at all. Kids have been sick lately, but some days I never even suggest they sit on the potty. Some days they initiate it and potty only on the potty all day long. Go figure. It will happen...eventually. Try not to fret, my friend. :D
Your tattoo post makes me consider posting mine. I just have three small ones in a cluster on my back. Nothing cool like yours. Hmmmmm...I regret mine usually. Why did I choose such bright colors? And WHY did Ironman and I getting matching lizards? I think my sleeping meds just kicked in. Whew! They hit hard! Better leave before I tell you something you never wanted to know about me. :D
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